August 31, 2009

WARNING: Gory

Background: Jay Brannan is a singer (jaybrannan.com) and the Jesse James I speak of takes the form of Brad Pitt.

Reasons: Salsa before bed; watching The Assassination of Jesse James; listening to a lot ofJay Brannan.

Dream: Jay Brannan and I were on an unnamed Caribbean Island perfecting a formula we had been working on. Then we went back to Jay Brannan's loft, which was above a convenience store. We tested out the formula and - it worked! We were now able to turn trivial pursuit wedges into diamonds!

We began transforming them and heard a commotion from the store downstairs. We sat on the stairs and watched as Jesse James entered with some of his honchos and demanded the formula. The poor befuddled store clerk didn't know what was going on! Then Jesse James lined him up next to a human sized gumball machine and sawed off the clerk's head and limbs (damn salsa). He inserted the head into the glass case and used the arms as dispensers. The legs acted as a stand.

Needless to say, Jay Brannan and I FREAKED OUT and hopped onto our twin firebolts and attempted to fly out the upstairs window.

Then I woke up.

Renee.